I Confess

In the spirit of the January issue of Skirt! magazine, I'm going to do some confessing of my own.

10 reasons many people would consider me uncool:

1. I like Sarah Palin. I think this clip gives a pretty accurate portrayl of the situation. I like Sarah Palin because I can more readily identify with her than Joe Biden. As a woman, I have much more in common with Sarah Palin than Hillary Clinton. Palin definitely fits in better in my neck of the woods than Clinton, and apparently others feel the same.

2. I would let Brad Paisley check me for Ticks. Country music isn't considered cool by many people, but I love his songs.

3. I don't like alcohol. I think it tastes the way I imagine motor oil would taste. Plus, I really don't like throwing up and that's definitely not my idea of fun with friends. At the risk of sounding like a public service announcement for youth, I prefer to remember where I've been and what I've done.

4. I have recently had a crush on a 17 year old vampire and a former druggie/male slut turned reformed philosopher. Guys who want relationship pointers should meet Edward Cullen and Marcus Flutie. (I hope I don't need to provide a link to Edward Cullen.)


4. I am a conservative Christian, which has a lot to do with number 1. I agree with Rick Warren's religious views, and I believe he is a good choice to deliver the invocation at the inauguration.

5. I am not a good judge of sexual orientation. I worked retail when I was in high school. I worked with one assistant manager for months and didn't realize he was gay until a co-worker told me. I went to the guy's apartment for a store party and saw a curio cabinet of Precious Moment's figurines and thought it was wierd he was keeping those for his mom. He was upset with the guy who told me. He kept it from me and an older co-worker because I was too young and innocent and she was too staid and respectable to know.

6. I am not convinced that Obama can change the world. I didn't hear him talk specifics too much. Hopefully, he can change at least a small part of our country.

7. I like to listen to George W's speeches. It's better than SNL.

8. I spent 15 minutes in lock-up. When I was working as a court interpreter, I accompanied a child protective services worker, a female who was my age, to the county jail to complete paperwork with a Spanish-speaking mother who had lost custody of her child. There were a lot of official visitors that day and the guards were out of room in the usual meeting spots, so they locked us in the church room with the woman and a walkie-talkie. After about 15 minutes, we had the paperwork complete and started trying to call a guard to let us out. It didn't work. After a panicked few minutes, I finally got a signal on my cell phone and called the jail. There line was busy. I had weak signal issues again. We began waving our arms in front of the security camera. No response. I finally got a signal again and called the court clerks office to tell them to use one of their secret numbers to call the jail and tell them to free the child protective service worker and the interpreter. Five minutes later, a jailer strolled in laughing, saying that a fellow jailer must have given us the radio with low batteries. I didn't do many jail visits after that.

9. I love fast cars. In high school I demonstrated the superior speed of Casper, my white Pontiac Sunfire, over my male friends' cars. A Pontiac Trans Am is my dream car.

10. I support Comprehensive Immigration Reform and the Dream Act. I believe that the current immigrants in this nation are not unlike those of previous generations who come here to seek a better life for themselves and their children. I do not believe that children should be condemned for the actions of their parents.

Am I totally unpopular now? Anyone else want to confess?